Saturday, 18 January 2014

Yes, it's weird. But it shouldn't have to go this far.

Hey everyone :)

Today I came across this certain video. It opened up with a woman from Thailand introducing herself and she was wearing literally her underwear. By this point I was like "…okay, just wait. If a random dude walks in then it's one of those kinda videos." 
But she ended up talking about how she felt unsafe going out and with the fear of getting raped. A few close up body shots were slipped into the video whilst she was talking, and I actually realised it was an advert. 
Anyway long story short, the advert ended when she was getting ready to go out, and she slipped something down the front of her skirt. 
Surprise surprise. 
She slipped down a 'penis-looking-thing' into the front of her skirt - as a tactic to ward off rapists - because it looked like a… you know. I mean, imagine being a straight dude (if you aren't one already), you're going to make a move on some girl and you end up feeling up something that resembles the thing that you also have… and didn't expect to find on this girl.


(Note: The comments were on a Facebook upload of the advert, and not on this particular video)

Now whilst most of the comments on this video were things like, "Omg WTF", "LOL I've neva laffed so much !!!11" or the over used: "SMH". There was another comment which went along the lines of this:
"Silly girl. She's wearing sexy clothes and then fears of getting raped. She shouldn't be wearing skirts."
The comment was a bit longer, but that was literally the just of it.
I know there are a lot of people with this sort of mentality. Where the action of raping someone is justified by the reason of, "she was wearing skimpy clothes. She was asking for it".

I just can't get my mind round the idea that this sort of thing is something to laugh about, or make fun of, or even justify with reasons of "she was asking for it."

Furthermore, here are a few things I have to add to this:
1) No one asks to be raped. I find it terrible how some women are backing up guys by saying it's the choice of outfit that leads to someone getting raped.
2) With clothes or without clothes, the motive to rape is still there. 
3) Why would someone do that anyway? You know you can pay for actual consented sex if you're unable to get it otherwise. And it won't get you into trouble.
4) The fact that some people think it's okay to rape shows more about their upbringing and personality rather than how the girl looks / is dressed.
5) The fact that it's gotten so far; where girls have to put phallic shaped objects down the front of their skirts/pants in order to be 'safe'. 

Moving on… Rape is a big case in India. It happens quite frequently there, from the citizens to tourists. And whilst there are punishments for rape, which include the death penalty, it's not doing much to tackle the actual deal.
The 2012 case in India where the girl was gang raped on the bus; the guys were jailed and one of them had committed suicide.

Really?

So this girl suffers from something that no one asks for, and she has to live with this for the rest of her life. While the people that did this to her, get killed off or just kill themselves to get out of it.
As much as I can understand peoples anger and hatred towards this, and they want people to be hung. 
The much preferred method that I'd choose, is to sentence them to lifetime imprisonment, in a cell, with grey walls, and theres a bed and a toilet. That's all. 

Why?

Because then, they'll really understand what it means to suffer, because the human mind can be cruel, very cruel. The fact that they have to sit in a small room for the rest of their life, thinking about how they got in there and what they did - makes for a much better punishment.
But, I know this wouldn't really 'scare off' other potential rapists.

But what about the people who are thinking of rape, and the future rapists?

Whilst there isn't much to do about people who are in their late teens and 20s and so on; there is something that can be done. And it starts off in the household. 
Children need to know that both men and women should be empowered, and they should be seen equally. What a guy cannot do, the women can, and vice versa. Which is why there should be that equal balance between the two genders. Things like domestic violence, objectification of women, the fact that only women can get a bad name and the man can get away scott free - is also a cultural thing, and this contributes to guys getting the idea that rape is okay. 
Now, there are cases of men getting raped - which is also a terrible thing too. It happens when they're seen as 'weaker' or 'effeminate'. 
Teaching children to have more compassion and to control their desires - regardless of what one is wearing - isn't an overnight solution. It will take years for the statistics of reported rape to decrease, but it doesn't mean that we can't start to educate people on this matter.

~ xoxo
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1 comment

  1. Thanks for sharing this - it's so sad that there's a market for a product like this, and as you say, the idea that anyone ASKS to be raped is appalling.
    I also agree that the solution is in how we raise our children - I think understanding that 'no' means NO is an important lesson that children just aren't getting anymore.

    Jess xo

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